
If this was the 1980s, I wouldn’t be surprised seeing Tom Hanks nominated for two performances at the Golden Raspberry Award. Let’s face it, the man had a rough start in Hollywood appearing in mostly silly comedies like The Money Pit or Bachelor Party. And then, in a what in the blue fuck were they thinking moment, he was cast as Sherman McCoy in the big-budget adaptation of The Bonfire of the Vanities.
Sherman McCoy should’ve been played by someone like Bill Murray, Michael Douglas or even James Woods before he became such a open creep. McCoy was a cross between Douglas’ Gordon Gekko and Patrick Bateman, a greedy slimeball who was the walking epitome of 1980s Wall Street greed and avarice. Tom Hanks is a nice guy. Even when he gets mad in movies, you can tell where he’s coming from. When he got belligerent when paparazzi knocked off Rita Wilson, it was expected, because he was a man standing up for his wife and was about to whoop some ass. And we had his back.
But if you catch him at any other time and just b e nice to him, he will reciprocate it ten-fold. So, seeing him playing a true sleazebag like Col. Tom Parker is the worst of casting. If Baz Lurhman’s intention in casting Hanks as Parker in Elvis was to portray him as a cross between Boss Hogg and the one veteran school teacher in every town we all knew was a pedophile, he succeeded. But Elvis is told mostly from Parker’s POV and that annoying accent and Hanks’ leering is the thing of nightmares.
Robin Williams can play bad guys and creeps. He did in great fashion in One Hour Photo and Insomnia. But Hanks is one of those actors who can’t play bad guys. His return to SNL for a cameo as David S. Pumpkins shows that we like the silly side of Hanks from those 1980s comedies. Anyone remember his bad turn as several characters including a English gangster in Cloud Atlas? He can’t play bad guys and he can’t play people with bad accents which is why he was also nominated for his role as Gepetto in Disney’s terrible live-action Pinocchio, which was also nominated for Worst Picture, Worst Remake, Sequel or Rip-off, and Lorraine Bracco also recevied a Worst Supporting Actress nomination.
The Razzies scrapped the bottom of the barrel and we had some doozies. Morbius and Machine Gun Kelly’s Good Mourning were also nominated, which is like shooting fish in a barrel with a bazooka. Blonde also picked up some nominations with Ana de Armas getting a nomination for Worst Actress despite also getting an Oscar nomination for Best Actress. Jurassic World: Dominion also picked up some nominations.
But there has been criticism that Ryan Kiera Armstrong got nominated for Worst Actress for the 2022 Firestarter. And the movie was awful. Firestarter was a mess in every which way but just because it stars a child, does that mean, she gets a pass? There’s the $64,000 Question. Most of the movies nominated over the Razzies’ controversial history have been vanity projects gone bad or studios trying to making Oscar bait but failing miserably.
There’s a big difference between Armstrong and Machine Gun Kelly, aka Colson Baker. But in all fairness, Armstrong isn’t a newbie to acting. Firestarter was her sixth movie and she had done TV as well. A lot of people must’ve felt her acting was bad enough to nominate it. I don’t think kids should get a free pass just because they’re kids, especially if they go into acting. You have to take some criticism.
Granted, a lot of kids are pressured into it, so if that is the case, then, it’s cruel. But then again, watching some child actors is very cringeworthy. Jake Lloyd’s acting in Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace can’t just be blamed on George Lucas. He wasn’t too good in Jingle All the Way either. And Dafne Keen who played Laura in Logan was very obnoxious at times.
I even went to school with someone who was an extra on a Disney movie Perfect Harmony filmed near Berry College where I grew up and she said that Eugene Byrd, who was 14 or 15 at the time, was very rude and ugly to people on the set. He’s had some legal problems later in his life so sometimes it’s the ego I guess some actors of any age get.
But for the most part, the Razzies are intended as a joke. Hanks is nominated as Worst Screen Couple for his “latex-laden face (and ludricrous accent)” and Andrew Dominik, the filmmaker of Blonde is nominated in the same category for “his issues with women.” Filmmakers and actors have egos and sometimes you have to call them out on.
And sometimes, actors have noted that the movies were awful. Halle Berry accepted the award for her ill-fated Catwoman. Sandra Bullock was also present for her win for the really bad All About Steve. They might have been good movies to film but studio interferences and changes in editing might have made them the awful movies they are.
When Wild Wild West was nominated in 2000, Robert Conrad, who had played Jim West in the 1960s TV show, was on hand to collect three of the awards as an expression of his hatred and distaste of the movie. You got to take the bad with the good. While the Oscars and Golden Globes and even MTV Movie Awards recognize the better movies, you can’t deny sometimes crap is made.
What do you think? Please comment.