Mark Wahlberg’s evolution from a himbo rapper in the early 1990s who was always walking around dropping his pants to appear in advertisements for Calvin Klein to an Oscar-nominated movie star is a fascinating one. For a man who in his youth seemed on the path of being another Boston-area criminal in and out of prison, he has turned his life around. Unfortunately, certain things can’t be forgiven such assaulting two men of Vietnamese ancestry when he was younger. He was adjudicated and paid his punishment. It still doesn’t make it right and forgettable.
A lot of celebrities have had checkered histories that would make us wonder why the hell should we watch any of their movies or TV shows. Yes, Wahlberg has turned his life around and claims to be a devout Christian, but still seems to boast how he would’ve stopped 9/11 if he was on the plane. He almost was before he decided to go to the Toronto International Film Festival.
That being said, a movie like The Family Plan probably hits a little closer to home for Wahlberg who at 52 seems a totally different person than that obnoxious personality about 30 years ago. Wahlberg plays Dan Morgan, a gee-golly-gee car salesman in Buffalo, N.Y. who has the wife, two-and-a-half kids and house in suburbia. (The Atlanta suburbs make for a good backdrop.) He’s living the American dream apparently. But he used to be an assassin before he decided it wasn’t the life for him. He’s stayed away from social media for a good reason as to live as off the digital information grid as much as possible. (Of course, this raises a lot of questions on how someone can even get a nice two-story house without a credit check or his employer would use his photo on the company’s website because he has to be such a good salesman.)
But all that changes when he finds himself in a background photo posted on social media as he and his wife, Jessica (Michelle Monaghan), at a county fair celebrating their anniversary. Now, he’s being targeted and after dispatching a person while shopping with his infant child, Max (Iliana and Vienna Norris). (I’m guessing they thought people would find it cute that Max is witness to all her father’s violence fending off the bad guys gleefully laughing. But it’s annoying and kinda creepy.) He lies and tells Jessica they’re taking a spontaneous trip to Las Vegas, chucking all their cell phones out to avoid any tracking.
Yet, along the way, he’s being tracked by other means and Jessica begins to notice some things as the man she’s been with for two decades speaks multiple languages and if you’ve seen True Lies or Mr. and Mrs. Smith, you know exactly what the expect next. There’s never really much excitement as the action scenes seem basic. And the twists don’t really seem that clever. You know when Maggie Q pops up at a fitness center where Jessica attends being a little too friendly, something more is going to be revealed later in the movie.
At two hours, this is a very long movie that throws in so many tired tropes and cliches, you’ll groan. I’m not even going to mention the children because they seem to come from a middle-aged man’s idea of Gen Zers. The son’s a gamer and the daughter who Dan half-way through decides to call “Beans” is boy crazy for her college-age boyfriend at Iowa State who never responds to her texts. Even if you’ve never seen a movie like this, you could still guess correctly he’s cheating on her.
When Ciaran Hands pops up as the main villain, he obviously sleepwalks through the performance for the paycheck. Why not? A man’s gotta eat. And it’s not like the acclaimed actor won’t miss out on another role in a better movie.
At $9.99 a month subscription on Apple TV+, if you watch one program/movie a day, it will break down to about 33.333 cents a day. And even if you’re watching this off free Wi-Fi, it’s still too much to pay to watch this movie.
What do you think? Please comment.
Zane Says 