Sometimes, life happens. And sometimes, life abruptly ends.
Earlier today, I was awaken by my cat, BeeBee, who was crying. He was at the foot of my bed and I thought he was wanting some attention. He had been lazy the last few days, but I thought it was because of the summer heat wave coming back. He moved to the edge of the bed and fell off. I think he might have been trying to jump from the bed into the closet so he could get on the top shelf.
But as I leaned over, I saw him barely moving and having labored breathing. I went to pick him up and he didn’t flinch or anything. He let out a little growl as I laid him on the bed and went to go get some toilet paper to wipe some drool off. When I came back in, he was gone. He was about 11 and a half years old.
I don’t remember exactly when he was born but it was March of 2013 when his mother had him and four siblings as she had claimed my old Ford Taurus with its busted window as a bivouac to birth her litter. As it got warmer, we brought the babies inside. I gave one to my former co-workers and my ex’s daughter took the other one, which was a plain white. But in both cases, their respective exes ended up with the cats.
BeeBee was the most anxious one to assimilate with the family as his siblings, Skitty and Caramel (because the brown markings on her body look like a caramel whip and his tail curled backwards), were as friendly but overtime they were. Caramel died five years after he was born from an illness. I had to have him put down. Later that summer, his mother, Sweetie, also had to be put down.
I think they had something in their genetics which is why they all seemed to get sick very quickly and die. BeeBee which was what he was called because “Little Baby” didn’t seem as appropriate as he grew and got bigger.
Like all the younger cats, Pookie would take them in and be a father figure to them. By a weird coincidence, Pookie would die four years ago on July 31 even though he started to show signs around the same time. I kept Pookie, BeeBee, Skitty and another cat, Baby Kitty, when my ex and I split up. She was always closer to Skitty and BeeBee but she couldn’t take him as her daughter who she lives with now already had many cats.
I didn’t mind. They were my furbabies too. Baby Kitty passed away in the summer of 2021. For the first time ever, this is the only time I have just one inside cat. There are some outside cats. But I don’t think they will take to being inside. I also don’t want to upset Skitty (which is short for Skittish Kitty) as old as she is. I may try over time to let them come in and out. We’ll see.
Ever since 2002, I’ve had at least two cats in the house. But as I worry about my health, I’m not sure if I want to have any more cats or pets. Many dogs should be outside where they can run and frolic, same as cats if they want to. But Skitty nor BeeBee never really wanted to go outside. I think it’s cruel to declaw cats but they never showed any interest.
I wasn’t able to bury BeeBee today. I had to go to town to do some errands that couldn’t be put off another day. I’ll do it in the morning when the weather is better and there’s not a heat advisory. Normally, when I bury a furbaby, I put some potting soil over their body before filling it back with dirt. I feel it’ll help their bodies work better with the soil as the worms, ants and other bugs feed off them and their bodies help regrow the grass. I don’t have any potting soil so I’ll just bury BeeBee in the trash bag. Maybe the pine scent will keep the scavengers away.
All animals feel pain and sorrow. But I think how we choose to bury or cremate our loved ones, even our pets, shows how much we cared for them, even after they’re gone.
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Zane Says 