More than 100 people from the Tahlequah community of all ages were present Saturday night for a candlelight vigil in memory of Nex Benedict, as well as to bring awareness to the LGBTQIA community. Nex, 16, was a nonbinary student at Owasso High School who died less than 24 hours after they were reportedly assaulted in a restroom at the school located in a northern suburb of Tulsa.
Nex’s death on Feb. 8 comes as many Oklahoma lawmakers are pushing to pass legislation that further discriminates the community. The vigil was held one day after State Sen. Tom Woods (R-Westville), referred to the LGBTQIA as “filth” during a forum of legislators held by the Tahlequah Area Chamber of Commerce on Friday, Feb. 23. Woods’ comments drew some applause from those in attendance. And none of the other officials present commented any on his phrase. Woods said he represents the constituency foolishly saying how its a Christian and Republican state as an excuse for his words before saying his “heart goes out.”
Woods’ comments were on many minds, but it didn’t seem to stop people from meeting at the vigil located in Floyd H. Norris Park, located on the northern part of the town, which is the capital of the Cherokee Nation. Officers from the Cherokee Nation Marshal Services as well as the Tahlequah Police Department were at the event. But there wasn’t much hostility as Christopher Wier, a candidate for the District 4 state house seat, encouraged those in attendances to talk to each other and even given them a hug if needed.
The park is located about a block from the Northeastern State University campus and there are many businesses surrounding it so the vigil was a sight to see for the traffic of people passing by. Yet the only heckler was from a passing vehicle that mentioned “God.” Cameron Crow, a transgender man, who was one of the founding members of TahlEquality, the community support organization which sponsored the event, spoke emotionally about some of the criticism he has faced over the years.
But he said there have people over the years coming to him, who bullied him when he was younger, admitting they themselves are gay, bisexual or transgender. Crow told those in attendance to pray not only for Nex and their family but those three people who reportedly attacked her.
“We need to teach our children to love themselves,” Crow said.
He added that he was skeptical of reports the three girls “blacked out” during the incident. “How much anger and hatred does one person have of themselves in order to beat someone to death like that?” he commented. “That is the kind of hatred that is unparallel to be able to beat a child into the concrete at that level. What are they being taught about themselves? What do they hate themselves so much?”
Details are still sketchy at this time. But Nex had reportedly told their family and school officials they were being bullied in the girl’s restroom and splashed water on the three girls. Then, Nex reported they were “jumped.” Owasso Police released an initial statement stating Nex didn’t die of trauma, but hasn’t released a formal report as a toxicology report is pending.
Nex and the three other students in question were taken to the school nurse. However, online comments are disputing the severity of the injures. Nex’s mother, Sue, reports her child was bloody and bruised and the took Nex to a medical facility where Owasso Police were notified. Online comments report that Nex’s head was hit against one of the sinks during the Feb. 7 incident. Nex collapsed the following morning and was rushed to the hospital after being released the day before. In body cam video, a school resource officer with Owasso is heard saying that Nex splashed water on their attackers, it could be viewed as a mutual fight since she started it.
However, a search warrant was issued and conducted on Feb. 9 where 137 photographs were taken and swap samples were taken. Choctaw Nation officials have reported Nex’s mother, Sue, is a member of the tribe. And the school is located on property inside the Cherokee Nation’s area. It is possible since the McGirt v. Oklahoma ruling, this case could go to federal court. There’s also reports that one or more of the other people involved are 18 which would mean they could be tried as adults.
Cherokee Principal Chief Chuck Hoskins Jr. has expressed support for the Benedict family issuing a statement in the past wee. “As Chief, the health and welfare of all children within the Cherokee Nation Reservation is of concern,” he commented.
Carden wanted people to know there are a lot of good people in the Tahlequah community who have supported them over the years. Sanj Cooper, President of TahlEquality reiterated those comments to other media who were covering the event, saying the Tahlequah Police have been supported.
Norris Park has been the site of a family-friendly drag show in the past. And TahlEqaulity has used the town’s municipal event center for a summer prom-themed dance in July of 2023. They meet on the fourth Saturday of each month at Tahlequah Unitarian Church located not far from the park and downtown area just a block away from the Cherokee County Courthouse and Tahlequah City Hall. Members have told me in the past that they have have received mostly positive feedback from the community.
Wier spoke with a few people jokingly suggesting they should make up shirts with the word “FILTH” on them to wear to mock Woods and others who are proposing anti-LGBTQIA legislation. I commented this is like when San Juan mayor Carmen Yulin Cruz worse a black shirt which had the word “NASTY” in white letters embroidered on it. This was following when Hurricane Maria which struck the Puerto Rican community in Fall of 2017. It was a way she had trolled former President Donald Trump for calling women “nasty.”
Legislators such as Woods are pushing anti-LGBTQIA legislation to win votes in my opinion. Wier told the people he would do whatever he could to help them. I agree with Crow and others that there are people out there afraid to stand up for the rights of others or to say they are gay, bisexual, transgender or nonbinary. But even if you aren’t a member of the LGBTQIA community or know someone close who is, it doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t help.
Cooper told media that events like these are important. “Sometimes, there’s a time where you sit back and watch and there’s a time for action. It’s the time for action,” they said adding ““If anything we are impassioned, the fire in our belly has been lit up again to continue to fight. If anything it doesn’t oppress or keep us from our voice from being heard. If anything it makes it louder.”
And I agree with Cooper. Inaction now will result in consequences later. For those saying, they don’t have any connection to the LGBTQIA community need to realize the politicians won’t stop there. Justice Clarence Thomas of the U.S. Supreme Court says they should reconsider gay marriage. Well, what happens, Justice, if they undo Loving v. Virginia. Suddenly, your marriage is illegal, Justice Thomas!
After they undo gay marriage and interracial marriage, they’ll target marriage based on religion. And after they do religion, they will focus one one particular religion. We will have to follow a religion we don’t want to follow. It will be mandatory to attend a church. People need to understand they will see how far they can go and go much farther.
In the end, they’ll ask what they didn’t do anything when they could. Now is that time. I was happy to see people of all ages there. Oklahoma like most states gets a bad rep. But it’s really just people afraid to live how they want to live because people bully and harass those they don’t like or don’t understand. And if they can get ahead by oppressing others, then so be it because it’s the only thing they have going for themselves.
They’re the filth.
What do you think? Please comment.
Zane Says 