I didn’t know Nex Benedict. As a matter of fact, I don’t know a single person who goes to Owasso High School or associated with them. Owasso is a suburb north of Tulsa. In the past few weeks, an incident has thrust them into the national spotlight.
Nex, 16, was a nonbinary student at the school who reportedly had been the subject of bullying for some time. On Feb. 7, they were at the restroom when three students came in and started harassing them. Nex stated they had got tired and poured some water on the girls. That is when they were “jumped” with Nex stating “All 3 came for me.” Nex’s mother, Sue Benedict, says when she saw Nex, her child was bloodied and bruised and Sue was wondering why no emergency responders had been called.
Owasso schools said all students were examined by the school nurse who later told one parent their child should go to a “medical facility for further examination” but doesn’t state who that parent is. The altercation reportedly lasted less than two minutes before other students and a staff member rushed in to break it up. Owasso Police were only notified when they were called to a local hospital and school resource officer took a statement. Nex was reportedly suspended for two weeks.
At the hospital, Nex and Sue were told they were “okay” and told if they were dizzy or nauseous in the morning it might be concussion. However the next morning on Feb. 8, Nex was rushed to the hospital by their grandmother, who they lived with, where she later died. Owasso schools has been accused of negligence for failing to notify emergency responders, which they have denied in a statement. Because of Oklahoma state laws involving students, they can keep many things confidential without releasing them to the public at this time.
While Nex might have been target by their identity, it brings a bigger issue that all schools in America should address – bullying exists. And it’s getting worse as schools in Oklahoma and many other conservative and even moderate states push legislation on the LGBTQIA community to satisfy voters. It also brings to question just how quickly school districts are losing control as ultra-conservative groups like Moms For Liberty are trying to get all books banned as well as passing disinformation on how schools are pushing a LGBTQIA agenda.
In 2022, a queer teacher at Owasso resigned over harassment started by Libs of TikTok and its founder Chaya Raichik. Incidentally, Raichik, a ultra-conservative pundit/anti-LGBTQIA advocate, used to be a real estate agent in the Brooklyn borough of New York City. Even though she does not reside in Oklahoma, the state’s controversial education secretary Ryan Walters appointed Raichik to the Oklahoma Library Media Advisory Committee. Their purpose is to remove any books they feel support a “pro-LGBTQIA agenda.”
Vigils have been held and planned for Nex. One is to be held at 7 p.m. Saturday, Feb. 24 in Tahlequah. A GoFundMe has been set up at https://www.gofundme.com/f/dagny-benedict. So far it’s raised over $66,000 as of this posting.
Sadly, this puts the emphasis more on the lack of work by school districts to prevent bullying. Most schools don’t want to admit it’s a problem the same way colleges and universities will tell you that crime and sexual assault doesn’t have on campuses. I think it comes mostly from treating the children with very kid gloves. The onus is on the Owasso police and Tulsa County District Attorney’s Office to file charges, if it determines there are any. If someone gets shot, stabbed or poisoned and then the next day, they die as a result of their injuries. The perpetrators should be charged. The Tulsa World has reported Owasso authorities are saying Nex didn’t die as a result of trauma but they are awaiting a toxicology report. There has been some criticism with how Owasso is handling the case.
Even though the Owasso police won’t release any other information, it’s possible an independent autopsy may be performed. The $64,000 question was Nex’s death a result of bullying or a full-on attack or a reaction to the painkiller injection she received at the hospital. If three people attacked them, then that’s more sinister and criminal. Oklahoma is a Stand Your Ground law. If Nex felt that their safety was at risk and pouring water was an attempt to flee, then they were Standing Their Ground. This used to be something Dan Rather would discuss on the Evening News and people forgot about by the Final Round of Jeopardy an hour or so later.
Now, it’s a story is making national news, because of Raichik, TikTok, and Oklahoma’s law that states students must use the restrooms from their sexes assigned at birth. Nex was just upholding a law by being in the restroom. Anyone can see that three against one is an unfair advantage and there are reports at least one of the students was older. If they were 18, then they can be tried as an adult. If Tulsa County DA files manslaughter charges or even murder charges, then it becomes international news in no time during an election year where there is a push on “wokeness.”
Another question is what accountability does the school have? Sadly, even in 2024, school districts are ill-equipped and ill-trained to handle bullying and assaults. Listen to me on this. Students and youth bully others because they can and are allowed to. There is not always a fear from another authority figure that makes them a bully. There is not always a situation at home that is making them act out. Boys don’t bully girls and girls don’t bully boys because they secretly like each other. This is all bullshit that writers and filmmakers have put in movies to give characters more depth and an arc. A lot of bullies come from nice homes, with great parents and the schools and civic leaders love them. They’re the preppies, the jocks and the students who are usually in the best classes.
This is what some people didn’t understand years ago when schools “encouraged” Walk Up instead of Walk Out following the massacre at Stoneman Douglass High School. It’s just like that stupid and bigoted He Gets Us ad that ran during the Super Bowl where the “oppressed” are getting their feet washed by the elite. It’s putting the blame on the victims instead of the aggressors. The people walking up to the students to be friendly are just as bad as the people (all white) who are doing the feet-washing. It’s like when someone tries not to sound racist but they end up sounded more racist.
One of the worst things in this world is a person or group of people who think they are always doing the right thing. But their right thing is walking around with a sense of entitlement that you’re better than others. It’s for people who think that all we need in public schools is “The Pledge of Allegiance” and prayer. And it’s hard to rationalize or debate with these people because they never see anything they are doing as wrong. They think they are doing the right thing for the students.
In my opinion, the right thing would be to redesign public restrooms for students so they feel more comfortable. Most public schools don’t have stall doors on their toilets. Others don’t even have stalls. Imagine the embarrassment a student must feel by having to use the restroom when a group of people walk in. I went to an academic bowl tournament in high school where there was a whole section where you could use restrooms with a toilet behind closed doors. There’s no uncomfortable space between the door and stall where someone can peer in. You’re in total privacy. Naturally, this was one of the schools in an affluent town/neighborhood.
The median household income for Owasso is $34,500 per individual and $67,000 per household. It’s likely the restrooms don’t have that privacy. For a state that is struggling in its education, the last thing they really care for is the comfort of students when nature calls. This coming six months after another Owasso teacher was arrested on second-degree murder charges puts the whole district in the spotlight. I’m sure most administrators and school board members haven’t been sleeping too well lately. Their hands are tied too per state laws.
Years ago, Bill Maher defended some teenage girls who apparently seemed to be shown in a video striking another girl and preventing her from leaving a house. This is assault, false imprisonment and kidnapping. Maher, who seems to act like kids are too soft, said this is just bullying, which is the same “boys will be boys” talk people say when the jocks and preppies do criminal things. I’ve often said people failed to see the irony that Richard Linklater showed in Dazed and Confused where Baby Boomers would haze freshman students. I’m pretty sure a few of them got shotguns pulled on them which is what happened to Ben Affleck’s character. It is set in Texas where Linklater grew up and still lives and films. Using rolls of toilet paper on people’s trees in their yards would result in guns being pulled on them now and maybe shots fired.
“Just bullying” is not a Get-Out-Of-Free Card we can use when people are getting hurt physically. Then, we turn around and tell them to shake it off because schools are afraid of getting the wrong parents upset. The one reason I will never NEVER be a teacher is I’m not going to kiss some tween brat’s ass because their father is the bank president or their mother is on the school board. The tragedy is that most bullied students don’t return to school with guns, they go home, turn a gun on themselves, take pills or hang themselves. Or in Nex’s case, they were probably given a stern talking to on the dangers of fighting because they didn’t want an ambulance outside. I’m sure if Nex had died while waiting for their mother or being examined by the school nurse, it wouldn’t have been handled so far the way it has.
What do yo think? Please comment.
Zane Says 